English teachers and business etiquette masters throughout the world will hate me for saying this, but here it is:
When you’re working with people through mostly written and online communications, emoticons ARE acceptable and are often needed. Informality is necessary to convey the appropriate tone in many situations and to prevent misunderstandings and hurt feelings. As someone who works with mostly people that I’ve never met face-to-face and rarely speak to on the phone, the underlying sentiment in written communication is so extremely important.
Consider my reaction to the two following notes (fictional scenario, I might add):
Kate,
I missed you online last night. I thought we were supposed to meet on IM at 8:00 to discuss the project. Perhaps you fell asleep on the couch? We must discuss.
OR
Hey Kate!
So, where were you last night? I hit you up on IM at 8:00 like we talked about, maybe I got the time wrong? Or maybe you fell asleep on the couch again ;-) Anyway, let’s discuss the project ASAP so we can get this thing moving.
The second scenario has basically all the same words in it, but due to the informality in the tone and the use of a winking emoticon, conveys a lighter tone and a more open nature. Of course, this scenario is fictional, but let’s pretend that the reason I wasn’t online at 8:00 is because there was a really bad storm and my internet connection was lost - and I didn’t have a phone number for the person I was supposed to connect with. The tone of the first message is rather hostile and makes me instantly defensive. The tone of the second message tells me that the person writing it has enough respect for me to at least leave things open for discussion and that all that really matters is that the project gets completed.
Of course, if you’re writing a cover letter or formal document, things would be approached in a different manner, but the issue of tone is seriously something to consider when dealing with employees, clients, and colleagues in online communication. I’ve had notes missing smiley faces that nearly had me in tears, only finding out later that the person writing it meant nothing by the tone and was just in a hurry. Lesson for me to not read too much into things, surely, but also a sign that the person writing it could have been a bit more careful to convey the true emotion of the message.
The workplace is changing, folks. If an emoticon will prevent an hour long discussion to clear up a misunderstanding, what’s it going to hurt?
By the way, a simple lol wouldn’t kill anyone either………….
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{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Thanks Kate!
This was good to read, I really wasn’t sure but, always use emoticans because I have always felt it’s so important to communicate a polite/friendly/human statement or response online.
you rock! \m/
Aronado
Kia ora Kate!
Hmmm.
In all fairness, the text containing the emoticon that you place so much emphasis on in your discussion, is not the same as the text without it. As a reader of English who understands the English language well, I’d say that the wording of any message is as important as any emoticon, if not more so. I think you need to think about your control in that experiment.
That aside, I teach about 200 students by distance. I speak to only a few of them by phone and have F2F contact with perhaps 1 or 2 a year. I use smileys when assessing my students’ work. But the number of students who actually repond and tell me they don’t like smileys on their assignments is significant. Given the 90:9:1 rule I’d say that there would be more who felt the same way than just those who responded.
Okay - even that number would be in the minority. But what I take from this observation is that not everyone thinks the same way about smileys.
Different strokes for different folks.
Ka kite
Ken Allans last blog post..A Message from Middle-earth on ItCanSay
Adding to Ken’s thoughts you also have to be aware that a large portion of the business people that you may interact with don’t even know what smiley are. So they wouldn’t realise that you are trying to lighten the message you are writing :) so may take it complete the wrong way. Or get totally annoyed by the strange use characters in what seems a normal sentence.
Ken and Sue -
Thanks for sharing the insights, lots to think about. I guess my main point is that online interaction is changing and perhaps it means that business communications need to as well. Ken, as far as your students’ response, I find that very interesting and will definitely take it into account - I’ve had NO negative response regarding this in my online courses, but may have to ask for specific feedback to make sure.
Perhaps I shouldn’t have been quite so focused on the actual emoticon issue, as much as conveying the appropriate tone when working remotely. It’s such a different environment, one in which misunderstandings can crop up at a moment’s notice and can’t be fixed as easily as they can be when working down the hall from someone.
Thanks for the food for thought!
I held off from using emoticons or txt abbreviations (like LOL) for a long time because I thought they might be taken as unprofessional. As time has gone on, I’ve started using them more and more. It’s very easy to misinterpret the tone written text is trying to convey. These misinterpretations can lead to negative feelings and all sorts of problems. Throwing in an emoticon or two and lightening up the tone help clue people in to the tone of your message.
Of course, it does require some savvy on when to use them and when not to, but in general, they aid in communication more than they detract, IMHO. :-)
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